David Merritt: “Poetry isn’t fiction. Poetry is a strange combination of poetic licensed bullshit.”

I for years have used poetry to paint pictures that let others experience a world beyond ordinary life. Each poem is a gateway in a different domain; I have written poems that escort into the underworld, the middleworld and the upperworld.

‘link’ links to the poem (to save/share). More poems are written in german.

I just wanna snuggle
into your lap,
Can I please do that please?
Maybe just for a while
or maybe for ever?
Otherwise I will sit
in a warm place
or chase the dog
or some hair tie.
Life is good
as a cat
(07/23) link

Haa Ha! She said smiling,
I’ve got you! You said that
you would not say that!
(07/23) link

You stand tall like a tree,
result of years of growth.
Ready to bring the fruits,
your work in the world.

Sharp, yet tender willingness
to create life on earth.
Your yes to life transforms walls
into bridges for evolution.

I wonder if you are aware
you are a force of evolution
rolling through the meadow
like a butterfly wave tornado

You transformational tree-plantress
creating a forest of being
one nurturing the other
connected singular villageness.
(07/23) link

I think relationship
is a short form of
relational space ship

you and I, King and Queen, || pilot and copilot
we fly together
to unexplored domains

fear and love as the fuel
for intimacy
for timeless space travel
(07/23) link

I am so glad you are here
so I dont have to chisel
your energy in stone
and carry you with me.
That would be heavy.
(07/23) link

I do not ever want to let go
of the gentle, sensitive touch
that our beings dance
when we carefully get closer

soft lips touching, will we kiss?
intimacy created in the moment
spacetime slows down to a halt
like the second before a crash

our spaces tangent creates friction
friction of love interaction
here and now invention of the moment
as if we have never touched before
(07/23) link

every morning

I want to wake next to a queen every morning.
So I find evidence that she is the gateway to heaven on earth.
I connect to her being, I look in her heart; most beautiful I’ve seen.
I see the queen, the child, gremlin. Who do I have my attention on?
I want to wake next to a queen every morning.
Guess who I have my attention on.
(06/23) link

gentle touch

I am afraid
of the gentle touch,
of the light sensation,
when you caress me.

The intensity
of the unassuming;
your hand on my skin
with fierce softness.

Somehow the less intense
is even more intense
as if a spark
hits like a lightning.
(06/23) link

I don’t know he said while mopping the floor
as if he wanted to escape his fear
of his own vulnerability.
(06/23) link

Everything freakout

And then he was there, the nothing,
damn, what do I do?
My box freaks out, all this attention,
and heck, why me?
Don’t you have someone else to reflect?

I am missing my hande,
What do I hold on to?
When there is nothing in the space – but me!
Why me?
Fear as basis for intimacy?
Now I can or can not go for what I want?
I am attracted to him,
but how do I even know what I want,
how to act? I only know how to react.
If it wouldn’t spark intense joy,
I wouldn’t be here anymore.

His presence kills all my deflection.
This is real!
His sword speaks: Right here, right now, you and me. What do you do?
(06/23) link

until death do us part,
or other happenstance,
like gremlin intimacy
(06/23) link

love takes space

a space so fragile,
so tender as,
two blades of grass
wafting in the breeze

yet so strong
as not the heaviest winds
can crease the grace
of these two beings

they have been waiting
all their life
to grow up
to this connection

joy in abundance,
with love and respect,
tends the bond
from being to being

how could love get
simpler than that:
marvelling in wonder
who the other is
(06/23) link

the meaning of life
is not
to search for the meaning of life.

instead, go outside
and be.
you are nature
nature is you

there is no abnormality
variance is the norm
who are you
ought to be
(06/23) link

It was she the everything
that asked for the dance
of archetypal love.
The beauty of her being
mesmerized the nothing

Convoluted energy
spiralling through the void
slow fast simultaneity
in separated unity
the dance of king and queen
(06/23) link

One more step

Just one more step
One more one more
Until I finally arrive
At who I really am.

Days into decades
Waiting for life
One step one step
Just one more step

Infinity in reach
Come on you can
Behind the next move
Go one more step

What is is pain
Around the corner
The final remedy
Just one more step
(05/23) link

single rose in a sea of flowers
thorns are in place
who knows if beauties attack?
(09/21) link

she said “I’ll do it.”
but it wasn’t worth.
emtpy words with no value.
(09/21) link


don’t follow the sun
it is not moving
follow the sun
while you move

use the sun
as a focus point
needs steadiness
(05/21) link

goes the axe
cuts the heart
of the tree.

is split and
will not get
(05/21) link

they are in emotion
they will not stop
the conversation is unfair
do not get hooked.

go in connection
lean at the boundary
take one foot outside
enter a new dimension

you are not a victim
you are responsible
there is no ‘i cannot’
go play full out
(04/21) link

stay awake
hold your attention
at one thought

wake up dazzled
when did drop the thought?
how long did i sleep?
(04/21) link

live life like
a game of chess
don’t fail your move
move your bodies
turn by turn

the board looks
yet the pieces move
playing their part
transforming the story
(04/21) link

shoot the voices

you are wrong!
beat yourself up!
addicted to negative feedback.
you are not good enough!
i will never make it!
you failed!
the revolver smokes.
(04/21) link

A day flies by.
Another week.
Slow down, slow down,
or else you might get carried away.
(04/21) link

There is a crack,
a crack in everything
That’s how the light gets in.

There is a crack,
a crack in everything
That’s how the light gets out.

Thus crack your heart,
let it break evenly
So others see you glow.
(04/21) link

said the pinguin
to the policemen
“this road is dangerous
if you don’t wear a suit”
(04/21) link

game over

… typing …
… typing …
i am waiting for the message
when will it be send

did they stop? did they reconsider?
… typing …

last seen just now
they changed their mind
… typing …

message received
it says: game over
2 lives left
go back to start
(04/21) link

a phoenix has to crash

when there is no way out
stay with the pain
let it burn
sadness anger fear joy
numbing does not work

if you’re lucky
– and this might take some time –
you awake in your next life

the phoenix has to crash
to be born again
and again
and again
and again
(04/21) link

say yes to fear
fear fear more fear!
i’m so alive
when i’m afraid

eyes move so fast
all senses wide awake
what happens next
what happens next

where do i halt
where do i move
what’s the next step
navigate dangers

how did i live
without my fear
how could i miss out
on this vast resource
(04/21) link

a thousand to one

life is life
bubbly, sparking life
yes! let’s go!
what is the next task?

life is death
sick, wicked death
no! let’s freeze!
darkness is spreading around

a thousand stories
to one reality
which life do you choose?
(04/21) link

our daily low drama give us today
inject it like an insulin shot
for our gremlins to go berserk

turnin turnin round it goes
more and more, you know the thrill
the ecstasy of grogginess

stop! rehab! go cold turkey
addiction is never cured
learn to live in impermanence

observe the wheel of feelings
what do you feel before the shot
stay present – keep a record
(04/21) link


oh beloved addiction
my underworld loves you
i can numb myself with you

covering up my real pain
you make all irrelevant
i can flee from life

wreck the current space
checkmate, the game is over
too dangerous to stay

Latin addicere
devote and sacrifice yourself
selfsacrifice it is.

what else can i create
where is my extraordinary
how to fly to new grounds

what is the problem i try to numb
who am i kidding
i need to break free

a hundred to zero in 3.2 seconds
(04/21) link

Connected bodies
Liquid state in one body
Spreads to the other
(04/21) link

revision seven
reliving the same rerun
layer for layer
(04/21) link

who i could have would have been

i changed a lot in the last few years
let go of so many lifes i could have lived
thank you, box, for letting me survive
thank you, for making me a good boy it specialist loner

i let go of the dream of patriarchy,
was living the dream with a wonderful partner
heaps of envy for our perfect relationship
people loved us and our interconnectedness

this could have gone on forever and ever
living in a pink bubble of love,
not grasping it being a fantasyworld.
I could have lived in a fantasyworld.

i look at the pictures hanging on the wall
old me, a layer of happiness over the pain
is it a better life to dig through the pain?
I could have lived in a fantasyworld.

yet what i didn’t give up was searching,
searching for who i am, what i want to do
searching for where i need to be and what to fill the day with
a long time the answer seemed to be ‘my partner’, the source of the layer of happiness

what is real, what is hidden below the bottom layer?
is there a bottom layer? where is my journey going?
layers of pain after pain it seems to me
is this what i now call reality?

yet i didn’t end up here randomly,
i made every small choice (un)conciously.
Not making a choice is also a choice.
Every day of my life made me end up right here.

if i’d turn back time, i wouldn’t make a different choice
else i would have chosen differently this life.
i am in love with the ups and downs i have
i am in love with the discovery of what is:
I am.
(04/21) link

Alone, no body’s there
Disconnected in a full room
Wear your bodies, being!
Feel, touch, sense, think!
(04/21) link

Present the present of present.
Here is your Now.
(04/21) link

i am a master at
suppressing feelings
i can teach you this skill
if you want to learn

i don’t feel any fear
fright is for cowards
i use my fear to numb
myself and feelings

i do not feel sadness
grief is for the weak
sadness is just there for
feeling self-pity

i don’t have no anger
rage is for killers
i only use anger
to tell you you’re wrong

i am not feeling joy
happiness is fake
i only use joy to
laugh at your mistakes

what we are taught as kids
suppress your feelings
relearning how to feel
is incredible
(03/21) link

fish snatch up the worm
yummy yummy
(03/21) link

they say
the pain needs to be big enough
for change

what if
the pain is already big enough
the transition is too scary?

i fear
the results might be unbearable
still i accept the consequence
for now
(03/21) link

split your attention
this is not multitasking
focus on two things
(03/21) link

please reintegrate
the transformation you made
the show will go on
(03/21) link

nothing to nothing they say
and kill your attention
(03/21) link

55 hours of headache

connecting unconnected neurons
firing new paths in my brain
pulses are tock tock tock
pumping pain in my brain

I don’t have to endure
I don’t have to delay
headache pain relief
I love your performance

yet I cannot hold it
pain comes back and comes back
more pain and pain relief
over and over, day for day

sweet pain of new beginnings
connecting what has been apart
it’s a love-hate relationship
i relish my mental liquid state
(03/21) link

liquid solution

how do you think
you know who I am,
if even i don’t know
who I was have been?

how can i ever say
i know myself
if two-days-ago-me
isn’t I anymore?

and what is I
if now-me just exists?
which will be I
if time is in two days?

the solution is to not be
in knowing who I am
the solution is to stay
floating as I liquid
(03/21) link

flowing through my veins
deep deep sadness
reaching dark domains

how to appreciate
who i have been before,
when i notice now
that i changed my whole core

of how my live has been
deep deep sadness
my new life is at its begin
(03/21) link

Breaking what is there
For something new to evolve
Something new to be
(03/21) link

life apart time

is there really
the thing we call time?
isn’t it just
a stack of nows?

850481 nows in a moon
that’s a big batch
i spend them so fast
how many nows for this line?

timekeeping means counting
the different nows.
suddenly 10 years
fit into one

do i create my nows?
or do i forfeit them?
there is a choice to make
what do i do now?
(03/21) link

are the backbone
of conciousness

committed to
connecting neurons
firing new paths
into unknown space

silk fiber
entangling around
unique knots
distinctive web
(03/21) link


the caterpillar
seemingly frozen stays
inside its cocoon

three weeks later
out of the blue,
a butterfly emerges

i press my pause button
pause of the outer life.
three weeks later i wake

time has passed till now
not only the date changed
i have changed my shape
(02/21) link

bullshit is what I write
just written 3 bullshit poems
and now I sit here,
writing more bullshit.
(02/21) link


invisible until it hits
not super fast and yet it fits
change enters through the door

day by day there’s no divergence
yet day by day there’s emergence
it’s speed is to explore

noticing slow and slower things
observing how the season swings
change is what I adore

so slow and yet it’s visible
transcribing is admissible
impermancene is core
(02/21) link


going back in time
is not possible
even if i most want it.

changing future past
is possible
future past is now.

what is here for me
to create
in this current moment?

odds will soon be been
if i do not
take them at the minute.
(02/21) link

there is a speed limit
on the mental highway
thoughts can’t teleport
inside the brain
(01/21) link


time is running through
my life, I cannot grasp it.
so many things to do
right now, I cannot clasp it.

how do I prioritize
if all I want is sleep?
I don’t overanalyze
small now is what i keep
(01/21) link

now – what is now?
i don’t know.
i’ve just quit
what now is was

next step, next step
go forward
in reverse
into nothing

go in action
ready for
(01/21) link

poem of energy

the energy is entering
through my beings soul
while i am centered centering
the full space in its whole

come through me, massive energy
come and stay with me
you fill the room so tenderly
your tender force is key

i love the sense of holding you
without force or might
together we can do vodoo
creating with ignite
(01/21) link

fear is riding me since days
it is strong, it is heavy
whereever I go, I have it with me
maybe we will become friends
(01/21) link

sucking my energy

my job is
sucking my energy
draining me
from every desire

like a black hole
consuming energy
it transports my fuel
into nothing

is what is needed
to something new.
(01/21) link


liquids liquidity leaking through
small holes big waves coming to
solidity as the fluid hardens or
crystalizes in the inner core.
(01/21) link

Being Eaten

What happens,
when I’m not taking care of myself
and let my Being
being eaten?

Letting the judgement consume me.
The constant pain of being wrong.
Dreaming of the other side

How long can I can take this no more
Not long before I can’t make a choice
Being Eaten

No way out is my false reality,
darker and darker my energy
I may not break free

Deep in myself I know I can choose
No power in me to make the choice
Withdrawing every connection

Change comes by pain being big enough
No change means my pain is not big enough
I am dying inside.

Surrendering until I choose to stand up for myself
The only hope that I have for myself
Waiting in agony
Being Eaten
(12/20) link